Canada’s Very Own Dokto Crisis

In the spirit of the current mission of the Dokto Riders to bring awareness to all the globe about the greatest international dispute of the modern era that could ultimately lead to the destruction of the entire world, fellow K-Blogger Gangwonbrian has decided to bring awareness to quite possibly the second most greatest threat to international peace and stability, the dispute between Denmark and Canada over the sovereignty of the artic isle, Hans Island. Introducing the Hans Island Rider:

I have been inspired by the Dokdo Riders. I will be a Hans Island Rider and travel across Korea (or, at least, part of Gangwondo) telling people about how Denmark is trying to steal our island, Hans Island, away from us wonderful Canadians. I will ask Koreans whether Hans Island is marked on their maps as Canadian territory or erroneously as Danish Territory.

I need to make some flyers explaining the value of our claim. I hope the flag and the banner don’t slow my cycling down too much.

The Hans Island Rider’s story is so compelling that Oh My News may have been inspired by it to write this article in support of Canada’s claim to Hans Island and the Canadian Artic:

Apparently, if we don’t keep on claiming that the Arctic is ours — by being physically there — Canada has some challengers coming from elsewhere, from countries who might try to assume property rights and raise their own flags there. It is kind of like squatters. If you squat there long enough, you might get residential rights.

This kind of hassle is not new. Canada has ongoing territorial disputes with the Americans over the Beaufort Sea, Denmark is claiming that some silly little island off the coast of Greenland is theirs, and Russia is arguing with us about who has control of the Arctic going right up to the North Pole.

For Canadians, this could be seen as a matter of pride. Our current national slogan is “From sea to sea.” True, some say we should update it to include the northern coastline. So, it should say “From sea to sea to sea.” Others suggest we should make it read “From sea to sea to sea to see.”

Note the fourth key word “see.” That’s not a spelling mistake. That represents the Canadian attitude towards Americans. Every time those folks do something foolish we say “See, there they go again.”

I’m still waiting for an article that blames the whole Dokto and Hans Islands controversies on a sinister plot centered around a CIA black helicopter conspiracy theory to gain oil and natural gas reserves for Haliburton while systematically slaughtering native wild life just for the hell of it.